Welcome to the beginning of a transformative journey toward healing and freedom. This is the first lesson of our Celebrate Recovery (CR) lesson series, and today we are going to talk about Denial.
Whether you’re exploring CR for the first time or returning to deepen your understanding, you are in the right place. CR is a Christ-centered recovery program designed to help individuals overcome their hurts, habits, and hang-ups by applying biblical principles and fostering a supportive community.
Related Principle & Step |
Related Scripture |
| Principle 1: “Realize I’m not God. I admit that I am powerless to control my tendency to do the wrong thing and that my life is unmanageable.”
Step 1: “We admitted we were powerless over our addictions and compulsive behaviors, that our lives had become unmanageable.” |
Matthew 5:3: “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.”
Romans 7:18: “I know that nothing good lives in me… For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. |
What Is Denial?
Denial is often a defense mechanism we use to avoid facing painful truths about our lives. It can manifest as minimizing problems, blaming others, or pretending everything is fine when it’s not.
It’s a defense mechanism that distorts reality, often rooted in coping strategies developed in childhood. While it may have once served to protect us from pain, denial eventually keeps us stuck, avoiding the real issues and blocking healing, growth, and deeper connection with God and others.
What Is Denial In Celebrate Recovery?
In Celebrate Recovery, denial is recognized as a significant barrier to healing. It involves a false belief system that prevents individuals from honestly confronting the reality of their lives, including their hurts, habits, and hang-ups.
Denial must be acknowledged and confronted to pave the way for genuine healing and transformation. By stepping out of denial, individuals open themselves to God’s grace, allowing for a deeper connection with Him and others, and initiating the process of recovery.
In Celebrate Recovery, recognizing and confronting denial is the first essential step toward lasting change, because we can’t heal from what we refuse to acknowledge.
The DENIAL Acrostic
In Celebrate Recovery Lesson 1, the word DENIAL is broken down into an acrostic that helps us understand how denial affects our lives and hinders our healing.
Each letter in DENIAL reveals a different consequence of staying stuck in denial. Let’s walk through each part of this acrostic:
D – Disables our feelings: Denial prevents us from feeling honestly. It buries emotions and keeps us from fully processing pain and healing.
Scripture Reference: 2 Peter 2:19 – “They promise them freedom, while they themselves are slaves of destructive habits—for a man is a slave of anything that has conquered him.”
E – Energy lost: We waste valuable energy pretending everything is fine. Denial drains us emotionally, mentally, and spiritually without solving anything.
Scripture Reference: Psalm 146:7 – “He frees the prisoners…; he lifts the burdens from those bent down beneath their loads.”
N – Negates growth: Denial keeps us stuck. We can’t grow while avoiding the truth. Healing requires honesty, not hiding or pretending.
Scripture Reference: Psalm 107:13-14 – “They cried to the Lord in their troubles, and he rescued them! He led them from the darkness and shadow of death and snapped their chains.”
I – Isolates us from God: Denial blocks our connection with God. When we hide our struggles, we miss out on His grace, truth, and healing.
Scripture Reference: 1 John 1:5-7 – “God is light; in him there is no darkness at all… if we walk in the light… we have fellowship with one another.”
A – Alienates us from relationships: Denial puts up walls between us and others. It damages trust and prevents deep, authentic relationships from forming or thriving.
Scripture Reference: Ephesians 4:25 – “Stop lying to each other; tell the truth, for we are parts of each other and when we lie to each other we are hurting ourselves.”
L – Lengthens the pain: The longer we deny our hurt, the longer we stay in pain. Healing begins when we face the truth.
Scripture Reference: Jeremiah 30:17 – “I will give you back your health again and heal your wounds.”
Denial hits on each part of the acrostic, and we will spend the rest of the article unpacking and evaluating how overcoming our denial to identify that our hurts, habits, and hang-ups are real and need to be addressed to have a closer relationship with God.
The Consequences of Denial
Denial, while initially a protective mechanism, ultimately leads to profound consequences in our lives and the lives of those around us.
It suppresses emotions, leaving unresolved feelings that manifest as anxiety and stress. Maintaining denial consumes significant energy, diverting it from healing and growth, which can further entrench us in our hurts, habits, and hang-ups.
Spiritually, denial creates a barrier between individuals and God, hindering personal and spiritual development. It also damages relationships, as the lack of honesty prevents genuine connections.
By avoiding the healing process, denial prolongs pain and prevents recovery.
Recognizing Personal Denial
Recognizing personal denial is a crucial first step in the recovery journey. Denial often manifests as justifying harmful behaviors, ignoring feedback from others, or feeling overwhelmed by life’s challenges.
To identify areas where denial may be present, consider reflecting on the following questions:
- What areas of your life do you have control over?
- Which aspects feel unmanageable?
- What coping mechanisms did you adopt in childhood?
- Are there family secrets that influenced your behavior?
- How do you typically handle pain and disappointment?
Denial is one of those things where you know it is there, but you begin to deny the denial to justify the actions or behaviors that you know are hindering your life.
Personal Testimony About Denial And Recovery
For years, I was in an endless cycle that involved heavy use of pornography, drinking, and compulsive eating to find comfort in an otherwise chaotic and stressful lifestyle. I was using those actions as a way to mask the hurt I felt, and I was in denial that those actions were harmful to myself, my family, and God.
I normalized fantasy and over-indulgence to the point where I could justify every action. The denial was so deep that I denied even being in denial.
Confronting denial is hard, and for me, it took my pastor saying on stage one Sunday, “If you don’t think it’s a problem, then it’s a problem.”
After hearing my pastor talk about his own struggles and how, if we want to get closer to Christ, we need to work to address our hurts, habits, and hang-ups, I realized that my vices and indulgences had consumed me to the point where I was unable to connect with God… and this was a problem.
I came out of denial first by talking with a trusted accountability partner, and then attending CR for the first time. During this visit I spoke with other men who had come through the same vices that I was struggling with, and this showed me that I was not alone.
The first step to overcoming denial is to know that you are not alone. You can have a community of people who have dedicated themselves to their own recovery, and this can help show that recovery is possible!
Conclusion
Denial keeps us stuck, but recognition is the first step to freedom. Celebrate Recovery offers hope, healing, and community through Christ-centered support.
As we confront denial and embrace truth, we open ourselves to God’s grace and begin the journey of true recovery. You don’t have to do it alone.
If you struggle with hurts, habits, and hang-ups, then we welcome you to join us in-person every Monday, watch online, or you can use this tool to find a local Celebrate Recovery meeting near you!